ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Let's get the cat blown out
Ladies don't puke and tell
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
