I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
