Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I believe in your delicious
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
