we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize