Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
