Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
