I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize