Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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