Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
