You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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