Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
