Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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