well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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