it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Floor bacon is actually really good
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
