Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
