I need help removing her.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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