Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I would ride that face into the sunset
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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