How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
