Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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