I feel great
I just peed on a car
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
