We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
