I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
