I'm going to jail i love you
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Randomize
