So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
