Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
