I'm gonna have a badass scar
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
