Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
my sisters under your porch take her home
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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