dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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