just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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