Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
