Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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