i jhust puked up my retainher.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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