Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Pants are for mortals
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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