Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
