How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
