I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i think i have herpe
just one?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
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