very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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