he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
