your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
