All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
