More tranny stories later!
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
