I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
handjob tips. give me some.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
