no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
