Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
