Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
