I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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