Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
