Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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