why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
