Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
